Unexpected blessings

So often in life the blessings are unexpected, unpredicted, unwarranted, unrealized. Christmas reminds me of this fact. God becoming flesh to redeem one so unworthy such as me--unexplainable. But Christmas isn't the focus of this particular post...I still have a few more days to cover that subject :) So I digress.

My life is full of the unexpected, unpredicted, unwarranted blessings. I post about many of them often. I try to live my life in such a way that the blessings do not go unrealized. I fail often, but I do try. Even in the worst circumstances, there are blessings to be realized. There truly is always something for which to be thankful. ALWAYS.

Most of you who follow this blog are family and close friends. So many of you know my story. You may even have lived part(s) of it with me. Abuse. Broken home. Divorce. And therefore, times of anger, rebellion, bitterness, emptiness. Sin. It is never pretty or fun. But the amazing thing is that God can take all that bound up in the heart, blanket it with Jesus' blood, and bring the blessings out of charred, barren wasteland. Bitterness becomes rejoicing. Empty is full. Rebellion is obedience. Anger is joy. AMAZING.

Too often kids in a divorce are prisoners of war. No matter if the parents are "friends" and its an "amicable split" or any other explanation people tend to give, its not the way God intended for marriage. Period. And that is not a debatable topic with me. I've lived it. And I wouldn't wish it upon anyone--ever.

That being said, I--along with the full support and encouragement of Daryl--had long since decided that I would not continue the cycle of unforgiveness and mistrust and rehashing of old wounds (that so often is the case in divorce) with my kids. They would not become second-generation prisoners as long as I had something to do with it! They will know (as they and I already do) that they are loved so very much--by all their family. They will find that people fail, but God is faithful. They will see that forgiveness trumps any hurt. That's God's way. Not the easiest at times, but always the best. And they will witness that God can do anything and everything with any situation to His glory!

So my story doesn't begin or end with the sin that tried to rob me of all things joyful--of all things from God. I have realized a multitude of blessings in the midst of the many storms. I'm still realizing them every day! And the storms aren't anything as they used to be thanks to my trust in the Anchor!!

All that to say, today I'm sharing about a special, unexpected blessing. Totally unexpected yet more appreciated every day. Today is my step dad Jim's birthday! And today I celebrate the handiwork of God in our relationship. What started years ago as a time of weekly fasting and prayer by Jim on behalf of the strained relationship between my mom and me has been rewarded by healing not only between she and I, but also he and I--something I'm sure he never thought would occur. But that's the business God's in--full out amazement so there's no question as to His power and glory!

I celebrate the many, many blessings not only in my and Daryl's life, but also in the lives of my kids because of just this. I am continually amazed at the healing that has taken place in my heart, the love that grows and flourishes, the peace that overwhelms me when it comes to "Pap"--as he's so affectionately called around these parts.

I know there was a time when he worried as whether or not all the grandkids would love him differently or less when they found out he wasn't theirs by blood. Well, out of the currently seven grandkids, none of them could give a hoot about bloodlines. All they know is their Pap thinks the world of them, loves them to the ends of the Earth, prays for them regularly, and makes them feel as though they are the greatest bunch of kids running around this planet. What else is a Pap for if it isn't to do just that??

Being silly with Brayden


Special time with Miss Savannah


Baptizing & celebrating our niece, Elle, with Uncle Frank


My most favorite memory caught on film...The Puddle


Enjoying The Puddle together


Happy, happy birthday, PAP! Here's to the unexpected, unpredicted, unwarranted blessing that you are to us in so many ways. We love you & celebrate you!!

My Midnight Musings

I know that nearly all of you check in for pics of the kiddos and I'm just the measly photographer/narrator, but tonight I can't sleep. It hits me every now and again when Daryl is away. He knows I get like this and will actually question as to whether or not I'm physically lying down in bed when we hang up the phone!

It is Monday. 9 weeks. Every Monday I spend alot of the day rejoicing and crying tears of gratitude that our LORD spared Daryl's life.

It never ceases. And I pray that it never does.

My life would be so very different had events of that day gone the slightest bit differently. And I won't even go into what my kids lives would be like. Talk about a humbling thought. They have a hard enough time (like their Momma) with Daddy rumbling out of the driveway early Monday morning and not returning until Saturday afternoon. Our home erupts with so much rejoicing when his diesel rolls in! There is nothing like it!! Sophia is the one who goes the craziest. And watching her absorb her Daddy as he scoops her up brings me to tears every time.

Had things gone differently, Sophia would not have a memory of her Daddy.

Instead she shrills, runs in circles, then waits for the door to open before she really lets loose! And once Daddy picks her up there's no putting her down. For any reason. Period.

Its funny because when I think of my husband, I often think of a story I received over email a long time ago. The story tells of a man entering Heaven upon his death and Jesus greets him. Jesus wants to give the man a tour of the home He's prepared for him. The man is overwhelmed by all the blessings, the gifts and beauty in every room--all becoming more elaborate and impressive as the tour continues. But throughout the tour there is one door Jesus keeps passing. The man finally can't take it any longer and questions Jesus as to why He doesn't show him what is behind that door. Jesus informs the man that He is unable to show him that room. The man becomes really confused and presses the issue. Jesus sadly informs him that behind that door lies all the blessings the man would have received--all the things that the LORD desired to give him--if he had only obeyed. All the things he missed out on because of his own stubbornness.

I relay that story only for the reason I often think of what would possibly lie behind that door for me because I feel that the LORD gave me the most amazing, undeserved blessing when He gave me Daryl. In all sincerity. My life has been so richly blessed--my faith strengthened--because of my husband. He has taught me more about giving and receiving love and forgiveness, seeking wisdom, earning trust, honesty, conviction, laughter, holiness, humanness, falling short and getting up to try again, grace, growth, and seeing people as God sees them than any other I have known in my life. And I tell him this every day. Honestly. I think as any wife should about her husband--he ROCKS! And I'm humbled that God would pour out such a rich blessing upon me. A sinner. So undeserving, yet so very, eternally grateful.

9 weeks.

I have found the freedom--and blessing--in obedience.

And I thank the LORD He chose to teach me from the blessing that, in my mind, could only have come from behind that door.

"Baby Girl" is THREE!

Today our sweet Savannah is three. What in the world?! Of course she wanted a princess birthday and that she got last evening! She was quite the sight in a pink feather boa, pink sparkly shoes, a pink princess dress, and of course the tiara with pink fur trim. Did this child come from my womb?? You could not have paid me to wear anything remotely "princess" as a little girl. Pretty much a tomboy here. But not our Savannah. The more pink, purple, sparkly, and/or girly--the better. And she also wanted Becca to join her in the Princess Brigade--it was classic. LOVED IT!! They're already planning their next Princess Tea.

She then traded in her regalia for princess jammies and her new "Fancy Nancy" sunglasses and purse. She did not remove those glasses until bedtime! She was definitely epitomizing the saying, "Sugar and spice and everything nice..."--with an extra added splash of spice for our Savannah, I might add.

I had all these wonderful plans for the cake I was going to make for her, and sweet decorations, etc. but that all changed when the dreadful stomach bug got me with a vengeance Friday night. Pretty much wiped me out. Needless to say, I was more than thankful that all she wanted was pizza for her birthday dinner! So we grabbed some pizzas and a DQ cake and she was happy as a debutante at the ball ;)

So, despite my feeling like a wrung-out old rag, the smiles and laughter on the face of our little princess and all her cousins as together they celebrated her third birthday were priceless...and worth every minute!

Overheard at My House

Brayden (on the phone with his older cousin, Leighton):

Leight, you're seven?! Are you big now? 'Cause I am five and I'm HUGE!"



Enjoying a late night ride--Summer 2006--sheesh, time flies!

The New 'Do

The kids were to have pictures first thing this morning, so I thought it would be a perfect time to try out the sponge rollers I picked up recently at a clearance sale on Savannah's hair. Note to self and others: Using sponge rollers on naturally curly hair will most likely result in looking like a Chia Pet:


How could I forget this fact being a naturally-curly-haired girl myself???? Anyways, maybe I should have taken the result as an indication of how the pictures would go! No professional pictures were to be had today...but the ones I captured on my camera are PRICELESS!!

Interesting...and maybe just a bit scary...is the only thing I can think of to describe it. Brayden thought it was nothing short of hysterical. And Savannah, although intially quite shocked at the reflection staring back at her in the mirror, found it to be quite hilarious as well. I just loved how soft and poofy it was! And I always did want to have a Chia Pet to call my own...but that's another blog for another day. Of course, she's still the cutest thing even if she looks like she put her finger in the nearest light socket! But I'll let you form your own opinion on the 'do:

BEFORE:



AFTER:




Come to think of it, I know some people who would have done close to anything in the seventies for a 'fro like this. But, despite of what they thought, I doubt they were lookin' as cute as this little one!

WE LOVE FALL!!!

Thought I'd make an annual event out of taking the kids' picture on our old wagon. What a difference a year makes! Compare our three to last year's photos. Here's to hoping you have a blessed weekend!

A whole hand...PART II

Brayden is five. Its still crazy to me. He's growing up so quickly and I don't like it one bit! What a blessing our boy is to us. A few things that I love about him before I share pictures in no particular order: his eyes, the compassion he has for others, his love of helicopters, airplanes, shuttles, satellites, and trains, how he glows after spending the day working with his dad, his love for family, his love for anything camo or army related, his innate and unending curiosity about everything, his HUGE child-like faith, the sincerity of his prayers, his conversations on the phone, his vocabulary, his love for reading, his unbelievable driving abilities, his love for building things, that sweet face of his that melts my heart, his creativity, the amazing playdoh sculptures he creates, his love for me, the love he has for his sisters, that he's a great big brother and takes his role seriously, hearing him and his sisters laughing their heads off together, his silly faces when I'm taking pictures, the blessing of being his mom, his abhorrence to carrots, his love of anything chocolate and how it gears him up, his ability to tell a great story, his love for scaring people and loving to be scared in return, how hard he laughs when you do manage to scare him or he scares you, how he starts laughing for no apparent reason--only to tell you he's thinking about when he scared you or you scared him, how he serves (with his sisters) as a reminder to enjoy the small things in life and take in each and every moment...its gone all too quickly! I could go on forever, but now without further ado...

HIS FAMILY CELEBRATION

The cake that he LOVED (Please note there are four men on each hill battling for control):




Suddenly, Commander Mom left the post to tend to other matters at hand (AKA guests) and the troops called in for reinforcements...LOTS of reinforcements:



Unbeknowst to Mom, it must've gotten ugly 'cause the reinforcements (AKA Sgts. Becca, Brayden & Logan) kept delivering...






Hard to believe our boy is five!


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HIS SCHOOL CELEBRATION

The beloved Birthday Chair:

My only thought: why don't I have a Birthday Chair?? Life (especially birthdays) would be even more fun with one of these around! Daryl just may return home to all our chairs being painted like this. Even funnier is that I honestly don't think he'd be surprised!


Leapin' Leader duties:

Holding the flag for The Pledge


Being the Line Leader

A funny story about Brayden being the leader. The leader gets to pick how the kids will line up by four categories: boys, girls, colors, or tables. The first time Brayden chose colors. He would say a color and if you were wearing that color you line up. This repeated until all the kids were in line. Well the boys just behind him were, well, boys and started running, pushing, and jumping in front of Brayden as they walked to the new Reading Rug--which is super cool by the way. I could tell by his face that he wasn't all that pleased with the outcome. So, knowing my boy, the next time it was time to line up he shocked everyone. Including the teacher. He chose girls! The teacher said that had never been done yet. It was hysterical...and I knew he would do it. You know why? The 5 little girls in his class lined up quietly and stayed in line perfectly behind him. No pushing, no cutting in line, no jumping around, just doing as they were told. Everything was calm and orderly--just as my boy likes it. It was classic. A memory I won't soon forget :)

There was also a little girl in his class who made him a special birthday card. It was so sweet. She kept trying to slide it to him during reading time and he was too enamored in the book to take it. I think that he thought she was just trying to agitate him as Savannah often does :) At the end of reading time the little girl mentioned her card to the teacher and Brayden went over so she could give it to him! Sooo funny!!


Waiting for directions during Art. (Hey, is that Leight sitting next to Brayden?!)

The class singing Happy Birthday to Brayden at the end of the day (he's in the center of the circle). They also sang to him at the beginning of the day!

Enjoying the Friendship Circle as they say goodbye for the day.


And I must say that it was so cool to spend the day with Brayden at school (thanks to Aunt Krystal for keeping the girls). Brayden's snack was a hit--ice cream cone cupcakes, string cheese, and juice boxes! It was great to see what he does each class and to have more insight into what he's speaking of when telling me about his time there. Needless to say, I could work there in a heartbeat...I guess because it is what I practically do everyday anyways and usually love it :)

A WHOLE HAND!

Happy 5th birthday, Brayden boy!!! I cannot believe my first born is five. A whole hand. He is all smiles today as everyone calls and sings and celebrates his day. He is most excited, however, about being the Leaping Leader at school today and also getting to sit in the Birthday Chair...talk about excitement! It doesn't get much better than this for a five year old!!

We had a little party for him on Saturday. He wanted a helicopters and camo theme. So that we did! The party store had NOTHING camo or even anything remotely related so I improvised...got tablecloths in camo colors, balloons in shades of green and brown, and made a battle scene cake. He LOVED it!

We're off to celebrate his day at school and I'm the special guest :) Many more pictures to follow of all the events for our FIVE YEAR OLD!!

Happy 30th birthday, Daryl!

Today is my man's 30th birthday :) I know that I am biased, and with that being said I can say with all that I am that he is the greatest blessing of my life. It may be his birthday but the kids and I are the ones with the gift! Thank you, Daryl, for being the greatest blessing to me/us. You carry many titles: husband, Daddy, son(-in-law), brother(-in-law), grandson(in-law), nephew(-in-law), uncle, cousin, friend, Christ-follower, boss, Youth Group leader, etc. and you carry them all so well! I am continually amazed, loved, inspired, uplifted, challenged, and humbled by you, the man you are, and the man you constantly strive to be. Mere words will never be enough to exclaim my gratitude, my love, and my devotion firstly to God for blessing me so richly and secondly to you for sharing life with me! I celebrate you, your life, your hopes, your dreams--even more so knowing how quickly it almost ended four weeks ago! Happy birthday, Daryl. I love you more every day. We're looking forward to enjoying dinner with you tonight! As always, YOU ROCK!!

A Walk to Remember

Sophia took her first steps back in the beginning of August. Like her brother and sister, however, she has only recently begun to master it with a HUGE toothy grin!! I'm actually thankful that none of our kids were early walkers. I've really enjoyed watching their progress and honing the skills necessary to take off on foot. All of them, Sophia included, went from taking just a few cautious steps here and there to just deciding one day to stand up and take off! Quite surprising and exciting all at the same time. I managed to grab a few shots yesterday as Sophia came after me down the hallway. While I forgot my flash thus making the first shot a huge blur, her expression is priceless! And you can also see the game wasn't so fun to her anymore because Momma kept moving her back while Momma remained further away to capture the moment! Oh the torture of it all ;)

HAPPY 30th BIRTHDAY TO ME!

Today I am 30! And, yes, I'm happy about it (as you can see in the photo above). No sadness here, no feeling sorry for myself, and certainly no feeling as though I am old and need to hit something (like below)! :)



I am embracing 30. I love this phase of life, the fun, the challenges, the relationship with my husband, kiddos, and our families--I am so very blessed! Besides, I already had my "getting old" breakdown at 20. Yes 20. I had a real issue with turning 20 and decided from then on I would celebrate each milestone. And celebrating I am in grand fashion...currently scrubbing the kitchen and living room floors, cleaning the bathrooms, and doing the laundry! HAHAHA! But only until about 5--then I'll clean myself up and celebrate in style with my family :)

And who knows, maybe I'll even get around to posting some pics of our celebration ;)

Sept. 8th: The Day

Despite the name of our blog, I rarely write about our business. No real reason why, maybe just knowing that most of you stop by to see the kids and their antics. Maybe because when you own and run your own business, it nearly engulfs you. Not that it doesn't have its perks, but even the perks don't outweigh that you can't clock out at the end of the day, enjoy paid vacations, earn sick time, etc. All the benefits of a regular job. Basically, its your life...day in and day out and every moment in between. And anyone reading this who has or is experiencing this knows exactly what I'm talking about. Otherwise, you have NO idea. So giving it even more of my time on my blog defeats the sometime-desire for escape. But something occurred at the job site on Monday, September 8th that nearly changed all our lives. And it definitely warrants posting (albeit massively edited for reading & writing purposes).

Up a mountain, in the woods, through a cornfield, and at the end of this gravel road:

sits a water tank, pictured here:


and just to the right of this tank is a manhole in the ground:


where Daryl nearly lost his life.


Overcome by carbon monoxide, he has no idea how he climbed eight feet up this rusted ladder and onto the ground above where the two men working with him apparently found him stiff, pupils dilated, and unresponsive.


His last memory was feeling the need to sleep while down in the hole and his next memory is of barely crawling along the grass thinking that if he stopped moving he would pass out....which he did. Almost eternally. His memories of that evening are few. He talks of knowing somewhere in the recesses of his mind that he may very well die--so he prayed for me and our kids and asked the Lord that if it was indeed his time, to be with him. Daryl was ready, but the Lord said, "not yet". And for that I am so thankful. Who knew that celebrating our 6th wedding anniversary the previous evening could very well have been our last?

The Lord has work for Daryl (and me and our family) to accomplish on Earth. Obviously. In the words of the Psalmist, what is man that the Lord should be mindful of him? I read those words, along with the rest of Psalm 8, to Daryl as he received his hyperbaric treatments. I could not read them without crying. Because by all medical standpoints, Daryl should be dead. The levels of carbon monoxide in his blood in such a short amount of time should have killed him. Or at least with some type of impairment. But the medical staff said Daryl had a few things going for him such as his age, his great health, and good response to treatment. But I knew what he had going for him most importantly: the prayers of so many, especially from a four and two year old. The kids and I were sitting down to dinner at the time Daryl was descending the rusty ladder into the hole. Brayden and Savannah were each saying the blessing for our meal and each of them prayed (as we always do) for the Lord to keep His angels around Daryl as he worked, to keep him safe. I like to think that at the moment Daryl was thinking of leaving us to enter Heaven the simple, yet sincere and heart-felt, prayers of two small children intersected his path. And I like to think that our Heavenly Father saw that these two little ones (and their little sister and I)still needed their earthly father for a bit longer. And I know that He sent his angels to bring Daryl out of that hole. And to respond so well to treatment from the EMT's and hospital staff--regardless of age or of health. And to have no side effects whatsoever. And leave everyone in the medical field shaking their heads while we in the faith field were dropping to our knees in gratitude and awe.

I cannot even begin to describe the emotions of the ordeal. The closet thing I could come up with is a blending of college finals with bringing home a newborn. Mental, physical, emotional roller coaster. Times one hundred. Or more. And for all the times of any given day that I tell Daryl I love him, what a great man he is, and how thankful and blessed I am because of him--well, you can times that by one hundred too. Or more. Every time I looked at him in the twenty four hours following I would tear up. And hug him. And kiss him. And tell him for the bazillionth time how much I love him, what a great man he is, and how thankful and blessed I am because of him. And I can honestly say that I am still doing just that...just as I always did but with even MORE fervor because I had a mere few moments to truly ponder what my life may be without him, not to mention our kids lives, my in-laws lives, our friends lives, our families' lives, etc. (Okay, so I had a three hour drive to think on this!)

I am acutely aware of the gift that the Lord has given me, our kids, our families by returning Daryl to us. And no amount of words or tears will ever express all that I feel surrounding it. There are so many blessings of that day--so many small details of the story that can't be explained or even fully grasped by our finite minds, so many "what-ifs"--that point only to God's hand at work. And three things really struck me in the ensuing days: (1) how thankful I am that if the Lord had decided to take him that day, Daryl would have gone knowing how much I love and adore him, (2) that I had already in the few months preceding had my "Abraham & Isaac moment" when it came to Daryl and our kids--the moment when I had to place them on the rock and cry out, Lord, they're yours. Not mine. And if it be Your will to take them from me, so be it. The Lord knows my heart. He knows that my greatest fear would be to lose my husband or one of my kids. He knows that I love my husband and kids with such an immense and intense love that it often moves me to tears for no reason other than how very blessed I am because of God's gift of Daryl and our kids to me. But He knows that the only thing greater than my love for them is my love for Him. And most thankfully it didn't take a life-altering event to know it or show it, and,(3) that with either outcome I know in my heart and can proclaim with my lips the words of Job, the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord!

My prayer and hope for you reading this is just that: don't let it take a life altering event to make what's wrong right, to bring you to your knees, to give to the Lord what is His. Whether it be your spouse, your kids, your job, your relationship with the Lord, your unfulfilled or even shattered dreams, your relationships with those near to you, your past sins or failures, whatever. Right the wrongs, forgive and forgive some more, show mercy, tell that someone how you feel, mend the bridges, hold things in the palm of your hand rather than a closed fist, leave your sins and burdens at the Cross, live without regret whatever the cost knowing that Jesus already paid the ultimate price with His life. Wow. What freedom! What love! What a gift!

September 7th: Six years & counting!

September 7, 2002 was and is the greatest day of my life. Truly. Daryl and I visited the church where we were married six years ago. I love this church. I fell in love with it the minute we pulled up to the curb, let alone once we stepped inside its amazing sanctuary. And like most everything in my life, there's a great (in my opinion) story behind why we chose this particular church for our ceremony.

I had always wanted to get married in an old church. One with history. One that if the pews could speak they would tell of revivals and weddings and funerals and personal triumphs and personal defeats and great hymn writers and great sermons and spiritual uprisings and everydday tears of all kinds: love, joy, heartache, brokenness, rebirth, rededication, peace, etc. You get my point. After visiting England and Scotland, my desire only grew. Walking through grand Westminster Abbey to the small little churches in the Scottish hillsides, I was in awe and humbled. No matter the size of the church, I loved the old stone, the worn wood, the HUGE stain glass windows (even in the tiniest of churches!), the naves, the monasteries, but mostly the mere history and majesty of it all. I would often envision angels, as Frank Peretti so aptly writes, resting and recharging themselves for battle as the people of God prayed and sang, their wounds healing, wings spreading, and swords glowing as they prepared to fight satan's dominion. While I knew it was nearly inpossible, I would love to get married in a church just like this, I thought.

So when Daryl and I began talking marriage, I shared this desire of mine with him. And one evening we were sharing this with his dad as we relived our individual trips to the UK. His dad immediately asked Daryl, "Have you taken her to Zion Lutheran?" It turns out Daryl had helped his dad paint the sanctuary when he was younger...all 60+ feet high walls of it! I loved that this church already had a history with Daryl and his dad. Not that the history was anything like those of the churches in England or Scotland, but there was history nonetheless and it was on a personal level! (And as far as churches in our area go, I learned that this one was built in 1791, nearly destroyed by fire then rebuilt in the early 1800's--so there's some serious history within those stone walls.) So I jumped on the phone and arranged for us to visit with the pastor and tour the church. No description of this church could have prepared me for what I was about to see.

I was instantly taken.

And transported back to those beautiful churches in England and Scotland.

From the massive stone exterior and the beautiful sound of the bells chiming from the bell tower, to the three-story tall stained glass windows, the choir loft surrounding the sanctuary, the amazing pipe organ and the old wooden pews...this church could tell stories. And I wanted our story to be one of them.

And so it was.

Each year we visit Zion and relive the many memories of Our Day. I love hearing the sound of the trumpet and pipe organ revirbirating in my mind the way it did from the walls of that beautiful sanctuary that day, walking along the courtyard where we took many of our pictures, listening to the bells ringing, and thinking of all the history Daryl and I have written and shared together in the past six years, all that has transpired in our lives since that day.

If only the pews could talk...

Sept. 4th: Becca's 4th birthday!

Our sweet Becca-boo (nickname Brayden gave her when they were oh so little) turned four September 4th. The kids had so much fun picking out some special things just for her from them and we headed over to her house to play & celebrate! Krystal kept the troops while I went for my monthly torture treatment a.k.a. orthodontic appointment. I didn't get any pics of the day or of our Saturday evening family celebration that followed...but I do have some dear ones of years gone by. These kids are growing up way too fast!